Dear Faithful Readers!

Yes, all 5 of you! :)

I'm not sure what the deal is but I'm never alerted when someone posts a comment on my blog post. Anyway, just now I went back and read all the comments that have been posted. You all are super amazing, and thank you for reading my crazy random babbling. If you have noticed this link is not posted anywhere, especially facebook, for a reason. I want the chance to be extremely honest without fear of ridicule or other thoughts towards my life and point of view. If you have been privileged enough to gain access to this link, you should count yourself as someone I trust! :) Yes I know this is a public website and people "sneak" in but for the most part, thank you for allowing this to be a place where I can come vent, laugh, and share with you the most important aspects of my life (and sometimes the really pointless ones too.)

**AND keep commenting even if it takes a while for me to read :)


Lastly, my facebook status reads this currently: "One thing I can tell you for sure is that the baby's room is going to be extremely unique! I keep looking around knowing that there are not any other rooms in the world that will look quite like this one! That's a good thing right??"

I thought I would give you a guys a Sneak Peak at what is going on in Baby J's room!




Really the only thing that is missing is the rest of the bedding, the book shelf that is on the floor in the second picture will be mounted above the wooden book self thingy and there will be a green toy hanger hung from the ceiling. Other than that, I think it's about done. :)

Hurry up and wait.

I'm anxious that's for sure. I think it's because I can't do much of anything.

I find I'm falling back into the mind set that I had when I wasn't working down here for the first 6 months. Even though being done with Bella was all I could think about for awhile, I would be lying to say I wasn't scared of what would come of me after I did officially end the job. I find days I have "nothing" to do ("nothing" being I have no plans made with anyone besides myself) I have no motivation to do anything. I woke up this morning expecting to get ready and jump in the car for a lunch date in downtown. Well, I had all these plans of places I needed to go and things to do, but when my friend canceled on me all motivation was lost! It seems so pointless to drive all the way down there for one thing, espeically when no one is counting on me to do so.

So here I am babbling again. I"m not good at this "waiting for a child to come" game. I'm way to much of a planner, and a mass countdown maker to be wonder everyday when this baby will come. AND... it is times like these where I'm starting to regret the decision to know the sex of baby. It would be nice to start setting up the room with pink or blue accents... but I suppose I have to wait again.

Waiting for a child to come, being uncomfortable to do just about anything in the process, lacking funds to go on a shopping spree, and being by yourself all day... what was I thinking? This blows! I feel like this whole month I'm just "hurrying up to wait."

complaints end now.

Ok! I'm Ready!

According to my original due date, I have 41 days to go! It seems so long and so short all at the same time!

I called today in hopes to get in on a maternity tour of the hospital I will be delivering at. No such luck... and no such luck until Oct. 23rd. I'm pretty sure if things keep going the way they are going you will have to roll me around the hospital to take a tour on the 23rd...If the baby can wait that long. If it not, it would just be pointless anyway.

SOOOOOO we went to our second best option... a $70 Prepared Childbirth class on the 16th of October. I have yet to tell Nick it is from 9am-6pm... all day! haha This is really not funny. O well, maybe it will be fun?? HA!

I am shocked at the amount of pregnant people in this city though. Nick always tells me it's a normal ratio because there are just so many people in Houston. However, I find it sort of odd that there are 5 Maternity Tours between today and the 23rd, all allowing 15 women (+spouse) on them and they are ALL FULL! Lets do the math 5x15= That's 75 women delivering soon! AND that's only counting ONE of like the 7 hospital LOCATIONS! I said locations, because we are just talking about one hospital here. I have yet to even guess how many are delivering in the other 10 hospitals in the medical center alone. Enough babbling.... THERE ARE A LOT OF PEOPLE IN HOUSTON, THUS, THERE ARE A LOT OF PREGNANT PEOPLE IN HOUSTON!!!

Geesh!

So yesterday I had a doctors appointment. Cervix is still closed so baby is all nice and secure still. I am excited that baby is still thriving in my belly, but I"M READY!!!! The doctor stole my list of questions from me yesterday and starting going through them. They were written in "short hand" and he comes to the word "gym." Well gym was written down because I needed a note say that I can freeze my membership at the gym. WELLLLL he looks at it and says, "ya the gym is fine!" I said "WHAT?" 4 weeks ago you told me to stay off my feet and only get off the couch to eat. Apparently, since I am now 35 weeks he doesn't care what I do because if I go into labor I'm "full term." So excited and overjoyed me tells Nick I want to walk across the street to the hospital I will deliver at, just to see where it is. After all I can do anything I want now :) So we walk over there, and walk back and by the time we got to the car I was in so much pain it was ridiculous! I had previously told Nick we were going to the gym later that night, and before we got into the car I decided to go back upstairs to my doctor and request the note to freeze my account after all! Lesson Learned: Just cause doctor says it's "OK" doesn't mean it's "OK." I have to remember I am not superwoman, I am carrying a child... a child who likes to hang out REALLY REALLY REALLY low in my belly and cause a ton of pain when I do too much. SOOOO I'm still taken it easy :(

I have an ultrasound scheduled for the 9th of October, which is also Miss Bella's first birthday party :) And then the following Monday I have an appointment to discuss delivery of Baby J! HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO ME!

Speaking of anniversary, we are celebrating our 2 years this coming Tuesday. Why? Because the melting pot is introducing their new menu, and we are getting a very significant discount on the big night out meal :) WE LIKE DEALS! Anyway, it should be fun!

And for your viewing pleasure, a sneak peek at 2 maternity photos I had taken a few days ago by a fabulous friend and wonderful photographer!

http://3monkeysjumping.blogspot.com/2010/09/263365-sweet-baby-j.html

"Welcome to your new home..."

"...The one you will be living in the for the next 18+ years of your life."

This was my mom's response to my panic of disarray in my house these past couple days. Here is a picture to show you exactly what I'm talking about. (Do not judge)

Pictures before sorting:











The next day after the sorting process took place:


It was sort of a blessing that a friend of mine was coming by the house the next day to take pictures of me, because I'm not sure I would have been motivated on my own to get everything into place. But THANKFULLY everything baby related has found a temporary or permanent home and we can again use our couches for their main purpose... sitting! :)

Even though it has been quite a stressful last couple of weeks I feel more blessed than ever. The shower in Valpo was so much fun. Around 50 people were there to help us celebrate this child! WOW! I am so lucky to have come from such a large family with such big hearts! And friends too, I can't forget how special my friends are to me either! The shower down here in Houston was just as amazing. I always complain about not having a lot of friends here, but the reality is about 13 people showed up FOR ME!!! That's 13 people I have known a year or less! FOR ME! What an awesome feeling to look around a room and see people that care about you! (It reminds me of my wedding where I took a "sneak peek" at the "crowd" before I walked down the Isle. And I am SO GLAD I DID! Even though I was filled with more emotion than I had been the whole day, the realization that EVERYONE in that room was there for Nick and I, it was almost overwhelming!) O, love... what a great feeling it is.

To continue on my babbling love fest I should mention that my mom showed up at my door last Saturday night. Literally showed up at my door, rang the door bell and just stood there waiting for me to let her in. Nick and I knew nothing about what was going on and she had planned the whole thing with an old friend of mine that is living in Houston. WOW! What an awesome feeling that someone would travel to come see and surprise you. My mom helped me more in the fourish days that she was here more than I ever could have imagined. I loved having her here, except the saying goodbye part is always the hardest. Whenever goodbye comes I always wonder if it was worth seeing her in the first place. The answer is OF COURSE yes, but it always hurts to bad to see her go. BUT as my last post said... I'm where I need to be right here!!

There are a lot of changes due to happen in the Taube household in the remainder of the year. Of course the baby being probably the biggest, but there are others that aren't necessary to be talked about at the moment. I ask if you are reading this though that you stop and say a little prayer for Nick and I as a couple that we stay strong through whatever God is putting in our paths. I am realizing that life isn't always what we expect it to be, and trusting God is really the only way to get through anything in life. This is a good ending point.

Peace

I feel like I should start this post out declaring my love for Rainbow Twizzlers. And before I shall continue, I need to get just a few more out of the kitchen! OK, now that we got that out of the way I can continue! :)

I just got done meeting with a friend for lunch that I haven't seen in quite sometime. I knew I would have a good time with her because I'm not sure I have ever not had a good time with her, but our visit was filled with much more than I expected. We of course were catching up with the basic "how are you doing?" I described feelings that my life was sort of turned upside down. For the past 6 years I haven't ever felt "settled." I went on to explain that I think the "20's" is the hardest stage of life that there is... but then I asked the question "Can you ever take a deep breath and feel content with what is going on around you? Does life ever slow down enough for you to feel truly content with yourself and the where your life is headed?" Even though I can't yet answer this question because I am only 24 years old, I'm pretty sure I have an idea how most people in every stage of life would answer that question.

I spent 5 years in college dreaming and wondering what my life would look like when I was "grown up." I got married in college, moved to Texas the day after graduation, finally felt settled and then up and moved 30 mins. away, started a job where I was gone for 12 hours a day, and then got pregnant. So here is sit in a gorgeous house, with a fantastic husband, a belly that is moving because MY child is inside of me growing and waiting to come out to be held and loved by me and my only responsibilities are taking care of my body at the moment. Sounds like a perfect life?? But somehow I find myself wanting more. More friends, more involvement in activities, more love from Nick, more feelings of excitement for the baby, more family that live closer than 1,000 miles away... more more more!

Nothing extremely specific was discussed during lunch with my friend and I, but as I got in the car to make my 45 min drive home I had an overwhelming sense of peace. Why do I loose this so often?

"I will lead the blind by ways they have not known,
I will turn the darkness into light before them
and make the rough places smooth.
These are the things I will do;
I will not forsake them."
Isaiah 42:16

Why am I always so scared/anxious of what the future will hold for me? Why is the present never good enough for me? I'm striving to do my best, but feel like I"m always failing myself. Truth is though, I'm just fine! I have nothing to be worried or scared of. Ya I often "wish" I was closer to family and could experience the fall weather but that is not where God is leading me. My home is in Houston, my heart is with my husband whom I should be trusting as the man of this marriage. My love is with my unborn child who I KNOW I will be a great mom to! I may not have as many friends here as I would like, or my family close by but why does that have to be a negative thing? God will give me these things as he feels right.

"Trust in the LORD and do good;
dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture.
Delight yourself in the LORD
and he will give you the desires of your heart.
Commit your way to the LORD;
trust in him and he will do this"
Psalm 37:3-5

"Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make your paths straight."
Proverbs 3:5-6

I hope by writing this all down I can go back to this on the days I'm feeling unsettled and can remember I have everything I need to be content and happy laid right in front me. Stop Searching for More and More!

November 2nd???

So we had our ultra sound today. Baby is measuring at 28 weeks 4 days, which puts baby's new arrival date at November 2nd. From the beginning of this pregnancy I told Nick we were going to have a Halloween baby... I'm still thinking that may be the case.

So the good news is, baby looks and measures good!

Bad News Baby is breach, and my fluid levels are low. Not scary low, but low enough to have concern that Baby won't flip over before November. Of course I'm nervous, and now I'm wondering if its even going to be in our best interest to meet with this midwife or just continue on with the regular doctor?? I dunno. Pregnancy is just full of unknowns and it sort of drives me crazy. I'm happy to hear that the baby looks healthy, and is a whopping 2lbs. 15oz! Crazy Crazy! But being breach explains for all of the movement I feel VERY VERY low! (For you visual learners it's like baby is sitting in a chair facing my right arm.) Definitely has a lot of explanation for a lot of things, which makes me happy we were able to have this ultrasound down today :)

So lets pray for a flip baby! YOU CAN DO IT! (But don't cause mamma too much pain!) So the goal from now on is basically drink drink drink drink drink water. It's about the only natural way to try and get my fluid levels up for baby to do a fliparoo in my belly or else I'm doomed for the dreaded C word. (C-section)

Either way, in about 11 weeks I'm going to have a child! WOW! :)

Two Day Recap

WARNING! THIS MESSAGE CONTAINS A HUGE AMOUNT OF RAMBLING TEXT. READ ON WITH CAUTION.


I feel the need to recap all that has gone on in these last two days, despite the fact I have a migraine and feel like I"m going to have to high tail it to the bathroom toilet face down soon. (This is only my second one throughout this pregnancy!!!!) Anyway migraine or not, I've had an amazing last few days and thought I should write it down before I forget how blessed I am.

THURSDAY
Jessica has been in town all week and I was lucky enough to spend Sunday and Monday with her but had to share the remainder of the week with her family. (I hate sharing!) Anyway, Thursday she got to come back to me and even come to work with me! My days are extremely long with Bella and her willing to come sit at work with me means more than alot of words can describe. Anyway, we were able to eat subway for lunch :) have some good laughs, watch Bella cruise around on her big girl walker, and we even got off a bit early :) Backing up to the beginning of the day when I arrived at Bella's house, I was told that the daycare called and was willing to take her a week earlier than planned. (I'm not sure if this was "questioned about" by the parents or if they really just called out of the blue with an opening. Regardless, I am excited to only have 5 days left with her instead of 9. The whole morning, I sat staring at this 10 month old, realizing that I just spent the last almost 7 months teaching her basically everything she knows. We have done everything together! She has seen the best of me and the worst of me, and the same holds true with me seeing her sides as well. I know exactly how to make her laugh and how to make her cry. I can make her smile just by looking at her. I know what foods she loves and what foods she hates. I can read her like an open book 90% of the time, knowing where she is going, what she is going to reach for and so forth... This child HAS been my life since January! I can't help but have bittersweet feelings about this. I am so ready to move on with life and stop spending 99% of my days at a strangers home, but I am so sad to stop seeing this little girl grow that I have basically raised. I tried my hardest not to get attached but the thought of only having 5 full days left with this child sort of makes me want to break down in tears and cuddle with her for the next 5 days! I will miss those sweet little eyes looking at me from over the crib rail when I get her up from her nap, as well as those silly looks she gives me when she is being O so ornery. YES I SAID IT... I"M GOING TO MISS BELLA OOOOOOO SO MUCH!!!

That being said, I am thrilled that I have some time to myself to prepare for this motherhood gig. Nick and I are more than Blessed to not be in a finical burden. We are not at all even close to "Having Money" and yes we still have debt from school, cars, houses ect. But we are making it, which makes it possible for me to take some time off before the baby comes, and then of course be a stay at home mom until Baby Taube is ready for school. (We hope.) I'm excited to use this time to get my house together, actually be able to decorate it, clean it, and prepare for a little body to run around in the years to come. I'm excited to wake up every morning and be able to spend some quiet time with my belly. As silly as that sounds I feel like I haven't gotten the chance to really take in this pregnancy experience. My world has been surrounded by Bella and I'm ready to actually get to feel what a "new mom" gets to feel like with just her and her unborn child. With this time off I will also get to travel home to Mom and Dad's for awhile, hopefully two weeks and really I'm just looking forward to catching up with old friends down here, and trying to make a few new ones before baby is born.

Getting back on the Thursday bandwagon!!!!
After Jessica and I were done with work we headed off to Ikea. I feel so lucky and so unlucky to have a store located in Houston. It's such a fun store and since they don't have too many locations not many people get to have the full experience of this crazy crazy store. Yes I feel like this store has some poor quality stuff, but you get what you pay for right? Overall, it was fun to be able to show her around and get a sneak peek at some of the items I wanted for today's trip with Nick.

After Ikea we headed over to Book Club. Many of you know I am in a book club with women that are mostly around 10 years older than I am. Secretly, I really don't even like reading all that must, but being with these ladies makes my heart melt. I love the time I get to spend with them, and their wisdom on things I have yet to experience is wonderful! They have been such a huge huge blessing in my life, and really I'm not sure what I would do without each and everyone one of them. (and another secret, I REALLLLY enjoy being the youngest in the crowd. :) It's sort of a motherly feeling I have towards them, at the same time they ARE my friends!) GEEEEESH I'm getting so off topic tonight! So I dragged Jessica to our monthly meeting, and it just so happened we were not discussing a book but rather figuring out our schedule for the upcoming year so it worked out well for her to come. We had an amazing dinner, shared many laughs (as always), and basically I always leave there feeling like a million bucks and extremely lucky to have met such wonderful women!

FRIDAY THE THIRTEENTH!
Today was a mighty busy day. Nick has two doctors appointments, the baby and I had one and we had to drop Jessica off at the airport. We all ended up leaving the house at 7:30am to get to Nick's Ortho appointment at 8:30. (yes, he choose a doctor almost an hour away!!!) His teeth are just looking amazing! He has only been in braces since January and the difference is just shocking. We both looked at wedding pictures the other day and were blown away by the way his teeth looked in the pictures. He always says I called him ugly, but I never did such a thing... and I married the kid! Regardless, I will say my husband is very much attractive with straight teeth :) Just makes me want to give him lots and lots of smooches :)

After Nick's appointment we all went out to breakfast at Denny's. It is true... this was my first time eating there. I have always been partial to the "International House of Pancakes" mainly for it's name but I may just have to go on a cheating spree with one of my favorite restaurants. I had french toast this morning (despite having pancake cravings all throughout this pregnancy) AND IT WAS AWESOME!!!!!!! I love french toast!!!

We dropped Jess off at the airport (tear) and headed for Nick's allergy shot appointment. After that we browsed Ikea, and found some sweet stuff for the baby's room. This being my favorite purchase.

Yes, that's a leaf canopy for over the baby's crib... EXCITED! I hope it doesn't look too too silly. Also, Nick and I bought a easel for Baby! HA! We decided we can store it in the attic but it was a must buy type of deal. We are so excited! :)

SO now comes the fun part and end to my extremely long ramblings tonight. I've been struggling alot with wanting to change doctors, mainly because I feel like I'm just another patient giving this doctor money. I think he is super smart and has seen a lot, and I really do trust him... but I've been struggling with wanting more from him. Today I asked him about the possibility of laboring in a bathtub. (Random, I know for my 28 week appointment.) He looked at me like I was not human, and said we just hired a Midwife in this practice and I'm going to have her come talk to you. THEY HIRED THIS LADY 2 WEEKS AGO!!!! She has been a practicing CNM for 19 years and just recently moved to Houston. Anyway, we got a chance to talk to her and she is a gift from God. I walked into this appointment with the question to ask my doctor his feelings on induction well now I don't really have to worry about that at all! I will start seeing her from now on, and she will be with me throughout my whole labor! We are going to try and do this labor things as naturally as possible. I"M SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO THRILLED! I just want to jump up and down and thank God for answering my prayers that I didn't even know I was praying about! I never in a million years expecting a "switch" like this to be this easy. And the best part is my doctor will be on call in case anything is needed. So he's not out of the picture, just put in the back of the picture! :)

With that being said, I have to go in for an ultrasound tomorrow to check my fluid levels because of some strange symptoms I have been having. I'm not really nervous but am anxious to see baby! It's been almost 10 weeks since we have seen Baby!!! As far as everything else is going, doctor's exact words were "Weight is good, blood pressure is good, belly measurement is good, glucose test is normal, urine is normal... YEP! Everything looks perfect! :) So I'm not so much worried for tomorrow, but it will be nice to have some answers.

The rest of the day help a nap for both Nick and I, and a phone call from a sweet sweet old lady that we met the first time we visited the church we are currently going to. O this message is just the cutest thing ever. It was the perfect way to end a perfect 2 days.

Wow... I didn't know I had so much to say!